Tomorrow is 5 months since my husband left and next week we would have celebrated 23 years of marriage. I am not sure how it will go but I expect the days leading up to it may be challenging. I have made progress in some areas and not in others. My self care Wednesday gave me amazing energy for the remainder of the day. Even got in a BodyCombat workout, which was amazing!

What self care did I do? I rested, applied some emotional essential oils and meditation.  I wrapped my arms around myself and held myself for a long time. I reflected on life and my belief in God. I was reminded in those moments that I was loved but most important that day was that I was wanted! I was wanted and desired by my Heavenly Father. My belief in God may be different than yours. I believe I am a divine daughter of the most high God, that He has a greater love for me than any human. He is on the sidelines with my ancestors and friends who have gone before me cheering me on. He loves me exactly as I am but wants more for me than I want for myself and therefore wants me to improve and grow.

The growth and improving portion is the hard part. We have to get outside our comfort zone and feel uncomfortable things. We need to do things we may not want to do because it hurts or stretches us. It makes me think of when we train we sometimes have some workout pain hopefully. It reminds us we had a good workout. The birth of a child, the first time trying something new or significant life change all can be painful to one degree or another. Eventually we will become more comfortable again and the pain will be less an  sometimes that means it is time to go again.

A pause may be necessary to allow ourselves time to gather strength to move into the next phase. Sometimes we don’t get that pause. Whatever it may be, knowing it is for my greater good certainly helps me, but sometimes it is after a nap. If given a choice I would stay in the comfortable place. It is warm, cozy and just as I want it. It is OK to be there for a while but then we need to move forward.

Our feet face forward for a reason. So we can remember the direction we need to go. We also have two ears and one mouth to hear more than we speak. Something I am still working on. At times it feels I have a lot to work on but life is not about arrival rather the journey.

Today I am literally on a journey to Stockholm. My goal is to attend a Freedom rally. I am showing up for Freedom because it is being challenged. It is not comfortable. I have to choose to stand up for Freedom or have security. I feel Freedom is God given and security is what the world wants to give us so we comply. Freedom to make choices is our divine right.  The  world wants to restrict our freedoms and I can not stand by. Every fiber in my body says it is wrong to not stand up. We are standing on the framework of those who have come before. Those who have stretched themselves and done difficult things. I too must stretch and not remain quiet. It is not the favorable thing to do and many may not agree, stop reading my blog, wanting to be my friend or even be part of my family but it is what I have to do. Stretching and growing in many different ways.

My journey began 2 years ago. The strength I gathered during these times has also helped me now with the stress of divorce, moving to Sweden and daily challenges. EVERY DAY is challenging. Some big, some small but every single day brings challenges. My goal is to remind myself I am gaining strength just as a tree grows its roots deep down when the wind blows. I need to grow deeper to be stronger. May you also grow deeper as your challenges arise. We all have different things but coming together helps us stand strong. United we stand, divided we fall. May we be united with Love rather than divided with hate. The first accomplishes so much more.